Take my phone, please.

I just needed a new phone.  Time to upgrade my old LG phone, the one that doesn’t do anything except make and receive calls.  It doesn’t take pictures, it doesn’t play music, it doesn’t text, nor have any serious attitude.  Heck, it hardly ever rings because I have a serious phone phobia and it’s all I can do to make a call.

So.  Off to the Verizon store to get a new phone…one that will take pictures.  That’s the only upgrade I wanted, the ability to whip out my phone and possibly make history the next time I’m on the scene of any earth shattering news.  My goodness, what a candy store of cute tiny techno gadgets.  I looked at the utilitarian phones, but I gots da fevah!  I walked out with the latest model of Chocolate in a cool maroon shade.  Trailing behind me was a music essentials kit to better upload music to my phone; a memory card so I could upload a ton (figuratively) of music; a Bluetooth headset so I could groove to ‘Jersey Boys’ wirelessly; and of course a car charger just in case I left home with an uncharged phone. 

The bill for all my goodies was impressive and I left the store in an endorphin high that had me feeling hip and cool.  I had a phone that would not only make and receive calls, but would also play music.  And take pics!  I was cookin’.  I went home and read the instructions.  I hate to admit that I’m weird that way.  Then I carefully put the phone aside to play with another day.    The phone is sleek, but the round scroll thingy is very touchy and difficult to use.  I couldn’t find the menus easily and after an exasperating while, fell out of love.  I can be fickle.  My techno high was short-lived and I came crashing down to reality.  I’m a child of the party line and rotary dials.  A phone isn’t an entertainment center.  It’s a gadget that’s used to make and receive calls….or at least retrieve messages because you don’t bother to answer the phone in the first place.  It’s a device of convenience, not a new appendage that must be attached to my body.  Me.  With a hip new phone?  I don’t think so.

I was standing in line at the Verizon store yesterday, tapping my foot, couldn’t wait to rid myself of the ridiculous Chocolate!  Who do I think I am?  I’m an unhip, uncool don’t-wanna-be who thinks you don’t use cell phones when you’re driving, or walking in stores, or dining in restaurants, or even walking down the sidewalk.  Cell phones are to be used in an emergency.  

Who needs a cool new phone?  I don’t.  So I said bye bye to that ridiculous maroon phone and got something in black.  With a camera.  I mean, I’m not that totally lacking in hip.  Who knows when I might want to snap a pic and make news at the next garden show…